After The Divorce - What Next?
If you’ve been in a relationship that ended in separation or divorce, then what follows may be of interest to you. If you are still going through the pain and hurt from the breakdown of the relationship then help is at hand. In a very unique way you can now free yourself from the entire struggle and move on with your life. I’m not saying it will always be easy. It does take courage to face all the pain and let go the anger. But perhaps you’re now at the point where you know that this is the right course of action for you. Reading about my experience may help you to find the strength to handle this major life change. You have the possibility of bringing something very positive to an otherwise difficult situation.
In my own life I was married in my mid twenties and when I married I thought I was going to stay with this man for the rest of my life. The marriage worked well for a time and we were happy together as we took on the role of parents and cared for our children. In reality, my marriage was in trouble for years but I was too afraid to do anything to change my situation. I was just too afraid to be on my own. But eventually we did separate and divorce and so began my journey.
Don’t stay in the “Blame Game”
I went through the anger, the hurt, the grief and the heaven knows what else. It was easy to focus on my ex husband and direct all my anger towards him. But one day I woke up and I knew I was ready to face myself and deal with the issues. I didn’t want to stay in the blame game and I wanted to move on and have a better life. I was finally ready to cut those ties and free myself up to move on.
Cut those ties? What exactly does this mean?
Cutting the ties that bind us to another person is a very powerful experience. It is about clearing the negativity in the relationship so that harmony can be reached. It doesn’t mean that you sever all connections and you don’t see the person again. It does mean that after the process, you will deal with the person in a very different way. You will be able to be with the person, detached and in control, without feeling the emotional pain. You will be able to communicate in a civil way. You will be able to let go and move on. You may not understand how these energetic connections work or how they affect you. But when you learn about the process, you will understand how to use it to bring harmony to a situation that would otherwise continue to be difficult. Let me expand a little on this…..
You have invisible chords and ties that connect you to the people in your life. When a relationship is healthy then the ties are healthy, but in a difficult relationship these ties become unhealthy. You might unconsciously already know something about these ties without ever having given much thought to it. For instance have you ever heard someone describe somebody as “pulling on their heart strings”? These “strings” or ties are the ones that I’m describing here. They don’t just connect to the heart but to all energy centres in the body. You have these ties to your parents, your partner, your children, your friends, your work colleagues and indeed everyone in your life. They might be invisible to you, you may not be aware of them on a conscious level, but you can certainly feel them. In an intimate relationship, when the relationship breaks down, one partner can continue to hurt and manipulate the other through them.
When this occurs, the ties always need to be cut. When they aren’t cut, the emotional connection continues to be felt through them and it may be hard to deal with each other without being angry. If you have children it makes life easier for them if both of you can get along and be civil with each other.
Cutting the Ties
In order to cut these ties, you need to work with a very high energy and you need to know how to transmute all this negative energy. This is something that I do very well and I like to make as easy as possible for all my clients. The added advantage is that your partner also benefits from the experience. It doesn’t always mean that you won’t have difficulties but it does mean that you will have every opportunity to resolve these differences amicably. Even if your partner doesn’t change it won’t matter, because you will change and will see things differently. You won’t feel the emotional upset as you did before and you will feel more detached. You may find after the ties are cut that your partner is more open to negotiating and resolving things amicably especially where there are children involved. It really does take a lot of hard work to get to the point where you can deal with each other amicably, but the reward is huge. It may even mean that agreement can be reached between you, without having to fight it out in court.
The Win!
Through my own hard work, I have a very good relationship with my ex-husband. This is of great benefit to us and our children. We get together on all occasions that are important to us as a family and we give them our time and attention together as parents when they need it.
It is of great advantage to me when I am working with you that I too have been through the experience. It helps me to fully understand what you are experiencing. Knowledge can come from books, but true knowing can only come from experience!
So consider joining me in Morocco, have a holiday, get the sun in your bones but let me cut those ties for you! I will make it as easy as possible for you. You will ultimately love the peace of mind and the freedom it will give you. Come and join me for a transformational week and let it be the beginning of a new you.
Please feel free to contact me for further details. Visit my site True Happiness Within, HERE
Anna Costanzo.
20 Nov. 2007
Anna is a qualified general nurse and midwife having trained at the Mater and the Coombe hospitals in Dublin, Ireland, in the 1970s. She is also qualified in alternative health related therapy, and is highly trained and experienced in energy therapy.
Visit her site True Happiness Within, HERE
Tags: blame, blame game, divorce, game, relationships
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